


Outpouring Tears

by RazzGamer5



Category: A3! (Video Game)
Genre: Ace Character(s), Angst, Grey-Romantic Character(s), Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-02
Updated: 2020-05-02
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:54:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23955667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RazzGamer5/pseuds/RazzGamer5
Summary: I've never really considered myself a good angst writer, otherwise I would write more angst but I've been writing more angst lately so here you go! Hope y'all enjoy 'v'
Relationships: Arisugawa Homare/Yukishiro Azuma
Comments: 10
Kudos: 39





	Outpouring Tears

**Author's Note:**

> I've never really considered myself a good angst writer, otherwise I would write more angst but I've been writing more angst lately so here you go! Hope y'all enjoy 'v'

Homare doesn’t ever remember crying. The last time he cried, he probably was only a baby. Even as a child, he’s never cried. The guilt eats him up at times, times where it’s just nonsensical to not at least shed a tear. But it doesn’t ever come out. It just doesn’t. He’s not sure what exactly is wrong with him. 

He thought he was done with these thoughts after he was the lead in “The Master likes a Mystery” and his troupe members convinced him he was, in fact, not a defected being or a broken cyborg. They did a good job, of course. He loves and appreciates his troupe members and all of Mankai. He really does. This place has done so much for him. But even so…his thoughts can’t help but wonder.

He can’t sleep tonight. He stayed up trying to write but ended up with nothing that could possibly satisfy himself or his fans and readers. And now he can’t sleep. Hisoka is sleeping in Azuma’s room yet again, and so Homare is left alone with his thoughts. His cruel, cruel thoughts that just won’t seem to leave him no matter what.

…It’s not that he never has the urge to cry or burst into tears. In fact, there have been times where a terrible, awful feeling builds up in him. He wants nothing more than to just let the tears flow out of him, get things out of his system. But he just can’t. Even if he tries to, it just simply doesn’t happen. 

This is the way he is, and always has been.

He falls asleep that night at 3:39 AM and shows up to practice the next day groggy and visibly less enthusiastic than usual. The others, especially Tsumugi, can tell easily he’s not like his usual self. He doesn’t know what to tell them so he just plays it off with some poems which unfortunately, are also noticeably lacking his usual charm. Luckily, he gets away with it for the day. After everything that’s happened, he should be able to trust them. To tell them when something’s wrong. 

There really is something wrong with Homare Arisugawa.

“Homare,” Azuma hums out, placing a hand on Homare’s shoulder. “You should come to my room tonight.”

“Very well. I suppose I can’t decline if it’s coming from you. And I suppose it wouldn’t hurt.”

“Of course not.” Azuma runs his fingers through Homare’s hair for a while (why he does that Homare isn’t quite sure) before standing up and heading somewhere (perhaps his room) without a word.

The thing is, Homare and Azuma are dating. They have been for a while. They don’t always sleep in the same room. In fact, more often than not, they sleep separately (minus Hisoka joining Azuma or even Homare at times). Azuma sleeps with people. Lots of people. The whole company’s always known that. No one is really bothered by it (though Tenma comes close) and it’s anything but a bother because…Homare is grey-romantic. 

Azuma himself was the one who helped Homare find that out. They are both very aware the term has different meanings depending on the person. In Homare’s case, he sees it as feeling attraction towards someone (Azuma in this case) not quite in a romantic or platonic way. More so, something in between the two. He can’t describe it exactly but Azuma says as long as they’re both happy how things are then he shouldn’t have to worry about a thing.

If it weren’t for them making their relationship known, most likely no one could’ve guessed they were dating. They don’t do anything vaguely couple-like. And if so, that’s just how they usually are. It’s not that they seem like they wouldn’t be a good couple or anything. It’s just hard to tell that they are one.

Homare’s writing block has been dragging out for quite a while. This whole week has been off for him. He’s out of it all the time and nothing seems to be going his way. He hasn’t been himself at all and it shows. 

Homare sighs and seemingly drags himself upstairs.

Homare opens the door with as much grandiose as he can muster in that moment, trying to make up for his previous lackluster personality all with one motion.

He enters Azuma’s room and closes the door behind him in one swift motion. Azuma chuckles, “You came.”

“Of course. Who am I to say no to you?”

“Mmm,” Azuma hums, hugging Homare from the back which catches him slightly off-guard. “You’re so good to me, Homare.”

“I-”

Azuma places a finger on his lips, silencing him. “Shh…”

They stay standing up in the same position, not moving, for a while. The silence isn’t a comfortable one. It leaves Homare to his thought, and when that happens- 

“Homare…” Azuma’s tone suddenly goes serious, his eyes narrowing. “Are you…crying?”

_ Huh?  _

Homare raises his hands to his face, feeling the hot wet tears dripping down.

_ Why now? _

Azuma gives him a sympathetic look, before embracing him with a hug. “It’s okay, Homare. Let it out.” 

It starts off quiet and slow and slowly gets louder and louder. Eventually he’s sobbing uncontrollably, muffling desperate cries into Azuma’s chest. 

The tears on his cold cheeks are hot.

He can’t stop crying now, it’s like every single little thing he’s held in his whole life, every moment he wished he could’ve let it out, is coming all out now. 

It takes him more than just a few minutes to calm down. Once he finally does, Azuma brushes and hand through his hair and says, “Do you feel better now?”

“I’m…not sure,” is the answer Homare goes with.

“That’s alright,” Azuma says. “That’s more than alright. So, shall I take you to bed?”

“You shall.”

That night Homare feels warmer than usual. Maybe it’s because of the way Azuma holds him. Or perhaps the aftermath of how the tears felt on his skin still lingering.

Well, the answer to that may have to wait for another day.

**Author's Note:**

> Talk to me on Twitter! @razzgamer5


End file.
